Operation-What-The-Crap-To-Mak e-Egderp-For-His-Birthday
by alchemic-rose
Summary: Seriously... Can't we make something besides cake, Harley? T for swearing.


**_AN: _****Hello! I am crazy busy with school right now, so this little drabble has been sitting unfinished for a while. Those of you who are waiting for an update for **Glance, **Chapter 6 is slooooowlyyyyy into existence. (I have the main chunk written) So in the meantime, enjoy this davejade drabble!**

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Dave stretched his palm out under the cascading water, checking the temperature. Once it had gotten to a comfortable temperature, he stepped into the shower, pulling the squiddle-patterned curtain (that disturbed him slightly) closed behind him. He shut his eyes and let the warm water fall against his neck, gradually turning his light blonde hair a few shades darker. Rubbing his face, he opened his eyes and was greeted with a bombardment of colour. He stood staring at the various shampoos, conditioners and body washes, as the bathroom continued to steam up.

"How the hell does someone have so many freaking bottles of soap?"

Back at his own house, he had his Old Spice, all in one shampoo-conditioner-body wash combo bottle. ONE bottle; his Bro had two… giving his at-home shower itinerary a grand total of THREE bottles.

Jade had TEN.

Ten. Freakin. Different. Soaps.

She had a head full of hair, he gave her that, but was it _really _necessary to have two soaps, and conditioners, three body washes, two face cleansers and a third bottle of who-knows-the-heck-what-but-damn-it-smelled-good. He sighed. No matter what he'd pick to use, he'll come out smelling like a freaking flower shop on steroids.

'You had to go and decide to bake some random shit that included lots of flour and bullshit for Egderp's birthday didn't you Strider…'

He reached for a bottle and squirted the neon, smelly, goop in his hand, and began to scrub his flour-caked head.

Earlier, Dave had bent down to grab a pan from a drawer below the counter when Jade had knocked the bowl of concoctions with her elbow, off the counter… right on top of his head.

Jade was in a shocked silence for all of two seconds before she busted out laughing. This subdued to less hysterical laughing and apologizing as she wiped up most of the goop… which then led to not finishing the cake as all of the ingredients had ended up on his head. Still busting-a-gut, she'd gestured him towards the shower, and said (between giggles) that she'd leave him an extra shirt (his had gotten the most of the batter, his pants were fine), while she went out to get some more ingredients for another cake.

The shower room became pleasantly balmy and humid, as Dave reached for one of the bottles of body wash. His hand grasped a bottle that was blue-ish green-ish in colour, and declared that it would make him smell like a mixture of cucumber and melon. What type of melon, it didn't divulge, but it smelled the least flowery out of the horde of bottles in the steamy shower. He squeezed some of the gel onto his hand, then rubbed them together, generating a lather that he spread onto his freckled shoulders and chest. Once he had scrubbed away the last of the food remnants from his body, he leaned back into the warm stream, shutting his eyes as the spray washed away all of the suds. Dave lingered under the warm water for a few moments before turning and shutting off the shower. Pushing the curtain back, he reached for the towel on the counter that Jade had set out for him, and toweled himself off before wrapping it around his waist. He stepped out of the shower, and steam swirled around him as he opened the bathroom door. The cool room kissed his flushed skin as he walked over to his clothes and picked them up from the floor. He pulled on his boxers and jeans, throwing the damp towel over his head as he mussed his hair. Dave dropped the towel around his shoulders and went to check if his shirt was done washing. He walked out of the bedroom towards the washroom, and heard the washer still running. He pivoted to go back to the room to hunt for a shirt when he heard the front door of the apartment open, and Jade came shuffling in, arms full of groceries. He moved to close the door she had left open.

"Hi Dave!" She greeted cheerfully as she struggled to balance the bags. "All washed up?"

Turning from the door, Dave took a bag from her nearly disasterous balancing act.

"Yeah. Just trying to find a shirt now… mine's still in the wash."

"Oh! I forgot to set one out for you before I left! Silly me…"

They set the bags down in the small half-kitchen, and she turned to Dave.

"I have to go get one more bag in the car. The shirts are hanging in the closet, I'm sure there might be one that can fit… if not my grandpa has some in his room!"

" 'Aight."

She smiled up at him and trotted back out the door; he returned back to the room to get a shirt. Opening the closet, Dave found about a dozen t-shirts and another dozen variety of dresses and shirts. As he riffled through them, he heard the front door open and close, and Jade begin to put things away in the kitchen. Most of the shirts were too small for him, and he'd gotten to the last of them before he found one that looked like it could fit. He pulled out the faded grey Beatles tee, examining it for a moment before slipping it over his head. It fit him decently enough that it didn't bug him. Grabbing his shades from the dresser, he slipped them on, and threw the towel on the floor by the bathroom as he exited.

Jade was busy getting things out in the kitchen, unpacking and putting away a few items she had bought. She glanced up as she pulled her hair back into a ponytail.

"You found one!"

"Yup."

"Ready to get back to John's cake?"

He chuckled.

"As long as you aren't set on pelting me with raw ingredients again."

He pinched the fabric of the shirt, tugging at the collar.

"I'm holding this shirt hostage."

She gave an exasperated huff as she flailed her arms.

"You know that was a _complete and total _accident!"

"Sure thing Harley, whatever you say."

She gave him a glare before rolling her eyes at him.

"Let's just get his cake finished before we have any more disasters."

He walked around to the side of her, leaning against the counter as she began to get bowls out. The kitchen was void of voices for a few moments, filled with the sound of clanging cups and bowls before Dave cleared his throat.

"Why are we even making him a cake?"

Jade glanced up at the sound of his question.

" Y'know he hates the stuff… vehemently hates it. Just sayin'."

She huffed at his statement.

"Yeah I knowwwww… but-"

Throwing her hands up, she pulled at her ponytail.

"I just want to do something to surprise him."

She glared at the bowls, frustrated.

"I'm not sayin' that's a cool thing to do but… why don't you make him something he might actually eat? Like… pie or some other shit."

"Dave, pie is completely different from cake and I just went out and bought a bunch of ingredients for _cake_!"

"Hey! I'm just tryin' to help out. Calm down a bit Har-"

"I am calm!"

"Wow. Really? Totally not feelin' the cool vibes right now."

"Okay maybe I'm not really but- ugh!"

She stormed out of the kitchen and sat on the couch. Dave stayed in the kitchen for a moment before wandering out to the living room. Jade sat on the couch, chin cupped in her hands as she glared at the wall. He walked over and sat down on the couch next to her, jostling her a bit as he settled into the cushions. They sat in silence, her steaming, for a few minutes before she sighed and spoke.

"I'm sorry Dave… I flipping out over a stupid freakin' cake. "

She turned to look at him apologetically, head still rested in her palms. He smirked and pulled her into a hug.

"It's cool Harley."

She smiled and returned his hug, squeezing tight.

"Why don't we re-strategize somethin' to bake for John."

"That sounds like a good plan."

"Cool."

She withdrew from his hug, giggling. He gave her a questioning look.

"What."

"You smell like a girl."

"No shit I do. Seriously Harley, Who the hell has that much soap in their possession. You are borderline hording that flowery shit."

Giggles escalated into full out laughter; she bent over hugging her stomach.

"I am seriously concerned. Man… Bath and Body Works better watch the hell out because '_Eu de Harley'_ is commin' up on their ass."

"Oh my gog Dave!"

"It's the flowery apocalypse, encroaching on all the big name badasses."

She slid down to the floor, gasping for breath as she laughed.

"Oh my gog… just- hahahaha… stop. My sides!"

He leaned back.

"I am the best smellin' man around now. See!" He gestured a hand down at her. "The Harley brand of flowery shit strikes its first victim!"

Still busting a gut, she crawled up to a kneeling position, leaning against the couch and smacked his leg.

"You are the biggest dork, coolkid."

"The Striders aim to be the best at everything."

He shifted and got up from the couch, offering a hand to the girl on the floor. Jade wiped away a few tears that managed to leak out, still chuckling. She took his hand and he pulled her up. Her ponytail was loose and her hair was around her face. Jade pulled the hair tie out and re-did the ponytail.

"Ooookay!."

She clapped her hands together.

"Let's get to work!"

He smiled and nodded.

"Operation-Find-Out-What-The-Crap-To-Make-Egderp-F or-His-Birthday is a go."


End file.
